LOVE OR INTRUSIVENESS: On Our Obsession With The Sex Lives Of Other People.

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I wasn't sure how to respond when my granny and aunt took advantage of a light discussion bordering on sex to ask whether or not I was still a virgin. 

You see, no matter how woke, liberal and unpretentious about your sexuality you think you are, there's something about the way they ask -- "I TRUST MY DAMOLA NOW, you're still a virgin, aren't you? -- that makes you want to shrink into your shoes. 

You answer yes - they hang on to your facial expression after that, watching for the slightest twitch in your face. But how does one keep a straight face in this situation?

You answer yes too slow (because of the time it takes you to recover from the initial shock of the question) - "She's probably lying. Or why the hesitation?"

You try sarcasm, go woke on them and ask why your virginity should be a subject of discussion in the midst of other trending world issues and innovations in arts and sciences - "Na guilty conscience dey worry am. Or why take a simple question personally?"

You can never win with them.

I really don't know what made me uncomfortable about the question at that time, seeing as I talk about these things with my close friends. 

But I think no one should come asking me if I'm a virgin with the expectation that I am one. I'd hate to know that your bias towards me would change, should you discover that I've ever experienced an orgasm.

And what of when I tell you I'm still a virgin? Keep the hypocrisy of celebrating my intact hymen away from me. I'm not necessarily a virgin because you raised me right. It just might have been for lack of opportunity. Something I jokingly refer to as "virgin of circumstance."

I think we should be more concerned about our wards being filled with the Holy Spirit. Then we won't have to worry about their sexuality. When your child is born again, it won't matter that they had sex just last week. They already are a new creation. Regenerated. Free from the hold of sexual sins. 

When your child is born again, you'll know better than to credit his celibacy to his strong will, or to the moral training you gave him. You'll recognize that it is God who has kept him in HIM, in order not to sin against HIM, for the flesh is weak. 

Still a virgin? (not virgin of circumstance, please 🙄😂) I commend your self-control. May your wait be worth it in the end. 

Popped your cherry? It's NOT a crime. Are you a child of God? He can help you keep yourself in Him, if you care about His precepts enough to want to. 

Cheers.


16.04.18

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