APPRECIATING MY BELOVED FATHER ON INTERNATIONAL MEN'S DAY

Just this morning, I was telling babe about my last phone conversation with my dear dad (in which we had spent well over an hour making small talk and I had still been reluctant to let him go after everything). I didn't even know yet that today is International Men's Day.

Anyone who knows me very closely would know the kind of ugly situation that nearly severed the relationship between my dad and I a few years ago. But here we are today, he's the best thing that has ever happened to me, besides babe of course. 😍

Anyways, I was recounting to babe and reliving how dad had said that he has always known me to be outspoken with strong opinions, especially as a kid, but that some of the issues I faced during my formative years growing into adulthood got me cowered a lot. And that even though I often put up this front of nonfuckery (pardon my expression, no other word could do better justice), he sees behind it all, and knows that mine is really still a fledgling intrepidness. 

This man gets me too much.

Because people haven't even seen anything of me yet. I have only just begun.

You see, those rather strong (and sometimes unconventional) opinions of mine that get people running to advice me lest I be backsliding already (lol!) only gets my dad mildly amused. His pumpkin is finding her own voice and her place in life, just like he has ever wanted.

With dad, I can discuss anything--career, feminism, religion with its controversial topics like tithing, even marriage, and every other thing you can think of--and I don't always have to be right just to prove that I am really developing as he wants of me. He allows me to be wrong, knowing that being right is not the goal, being able to critically evaluate situations is.

My dad hasn't raised me to be your perfect African woman, or your perfect christian wife, or YOUR perfect anything at all. Rather, he pushes me to excel in my career and academics, and whatever else I fancy, and he's doing all that is in his power to get me established and confident in my being before I run off to one husband's house when he'll be forced to start minding his business. 😂

I have babe, and not some insecure, entitled, abusive, manipulative, domineering irresponsible male with some warped Nigerian mentalities because of dad. It's hard to have a man like my dad in your life, who validates you at every given opportunity and makes you feel deserving of (not same as 'entitled to') everything you aspire to, and still settle for anything less than your specs. 

I am what I am by the mercy of God.

I am what I am because of the backbone that my father has ever been to me. He is my Hero.

And what is Addeda without an Add? (If you know you know. Lol.)

Here's to the Number One and Number Two men in my life right now, and to the many male persons that follow, bringing a delightsome variety into my world: HAPPY INTERNATIONAL MEN'S DAY. I CELEBRATE YOU ALL. 🖤🖤

10.11.18